Tuesday, September 29, 2015

I See Your Pain: An Explanation of What I'm Looking At Before I Ask if You're OK

I know, we are instructed, basically from birth that showing sadness or pain or any other negative emotion is not okay and it means you're weak. I am here to tell you that this is not true. it is OK not to be OK. And you are going to try and smile and laugh it off, just as I do when I'm upset, but your face gives you away. Here's what I see:

1. Fake Smiles: This is a ridiculously common one. People give me a so called reassuring smile. However, in real smiles, the corners of the eyes are crinkled, and this is not the case in fake smiles.

2. Eyes outward: This blue is easier to notice when you are not speaking or actively engaged in a program. The eyes shift away from one another.

3. Mouth corners turned slightly down--yet another sign of sadness

4. Inner eyebrows raised. This one is often very subtle, and I often miss it.

This all being said, I want to make a point. I read people who I care about. once I spot a fake smile, i start paying more attention to that person's face when they don't think that anyone is looking at them. When I ask if you are okay, I don't mean to pry. I just want you to know that I care, no matter what.

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